George Washington's lovesong Sarah (Sally) Cary Fairfax
- jimmoyer1
- Oct 15, 2024
- 28 min read
Updated: Jun 28
George Washington loved Sarah (Sally) Cary. But most mentions of this adoration fail to really emphasize one major obstacle. Sara (Sally) was married.
She was married to George William Fairfax. George William Fairfax married Sarah (Sally) Cary in December 1748.
James Flexner writes, "After Martha had accepted George, Sally Fairfax could not resist teasing her longtime admirer about his 'anxiety' at the 'animating prospect of possessing Mrs Custis.'
This elicited from the young soldier, away on the Forbes Expedition, a passionate avowal that he loved only Sally.
"You have drawn me, my dear Madam, or rather have I drawn myself into an honest confession of a simple fact. Misconstrue not my meaning . . . nor expose it. The world has no business to know the object of love declared in this manner to you, when I want to conceal it."
He tried to elicit from Sally a similar avowal. Although she kept Washington's letter by her for all her life, she did not give him the assurance he desired."
Sources:
Washington: The Indispensable Man (Illustrated Editions) Hardcover – Illustrated, November 6, 2012 by James Thomas Flexner (Author), and 3rd paragrah of letter GW writes to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 12 Sept 1758 : https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Washington/02-06-02-0013
But just to re-emphasize the original point. Sally is married --- 10 years into the marriage.
By the time of that letter of 12 Sept 1758 above, she has been married 10 years. George will marry Martha almost 4 months later 6 Jan 1759.
By 1760, Sally and her husband find it necessary to look after their new inheritance and her health by departing for England. Her health is not good. Her husband's income stream is not guaranteed.
We are still working on the exact dates of all their trips back and forth from England.
That's it.
That's our lead story.
There's always more.
Skip around.
Read bits and pieces.
Compiled and research by Jim Moyer March 2024, updated 11/10/2024, reposted to Oct 2024
Table of Contents
Income, health, race issues
George William Fairfax is son to William Fairfax who passed away Sept 1757. George William Fairfax's father, William Fairfax had held the positions of Customs, President of Council and top representative of Lord Fairfax. Because George William Fairfax's Dad passed on that left those lucrative positions open. Very quickly Thomas Bryan Martin became more valuable to Lord Fairfax than George William Fairfax's weaker efforts. And the Customs and President of Council positions were not open George William Fairfax. So where was his income source now? An inheritance in England had to fought for and confirmed.
His father, William Fairfax, worried that his son, George William Fairfax, might be thought to have mixed race. The father had sent his son to England when his son was 7 years old and hoped those in care of them would not be against his son for having mixed race.
Mulatto Blood?
From a PBS article
Despite the importance of the Fairfaxes to George Washington's formative years as a young man, the question of the Negro blood of those in this family who were closest to Washington has never been fully explored. True, a small number of the first President's biographers have broached the topic, but even these have treated it as nothing more than an interesting rumor. Of any number of scholars whose attitudes on race might have contributed to this omission, the most obvious culprit is Edward D. Neill. And it is his edition of the Fairfax papers published in 1868 which provides us with a smoking gun. Among the letters he transcribed was one which, if it had been printed in its entirety, would have prevented any doubt about the ethnic mix of this particular side of the Fairfax family.
In a letter to his mother, Col. William Fairfax (the representative and agent for his uncle Lord Thomas, Proprietor of the Great Necks region of Virginia) warily hints for her help in having his son educated in England. He wrote,
Col. Gale has indeed kindly offered to take the care of safe conducting my eldest son George, upwards of seven years old but I judged it too forward to send him before I had your's or some one of his Uncles' or Aunts' invitation, altho' I have no reason to doubt any of their indulgences to a poor West India boy *****.
Since "West Indian" had the same meaning as "Creole" which the French and Spanish used to indicate colonial born, the term could mean anything. However, a copy of the original letter surfaced recently and I was finally able to fill in the missing words after those five asterisks. They read,
especially as he has the marks in his visage that will always testify his parentage.
Source:
GW Marries Martha
George Washington marries Martha Dandridge Custis on 6 Jan 1759.
And just for a moment, let us take a detour, to observe something of George Washington's marriage to Martha.
That day of isn't random. That happens to be a special day. That day happens to be the 12th day of the Twelve Days of Christmas. If you count Christmas Day as Day One of the Twelve Days of Christmas, then 6 January is the 12th day. That 12th Day is also known as 3 Kings Day, when the 3 Wise Men came to see baby Jesus. That 12th Day is also known as Epiphany. Epiphany is sudden knowledge. Sudden knowledge of what? This author will leave that to the reader who probably knows already. So was this 12th Day widely observed then? Yes it was.In some ways it was more celebrated than Christmas Day, the 1st of the 12 Days of Christmas. See sources for that claim.
Then in May of 1760, Sarah Cary Fairfax and her husband leaves for England.

Source of painting. Unknown artist.
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Letters from GW to Sarah (Sally)
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1755
1From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 30 April 1755 (Washington Papers)
In order to engage your corrispondance, I think it expedient, just is incumbent on me to deserve...
2From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 14 May 1755 (Washington Papers)
I have, at last, with great pains and difficulty, discover’d the Reason why Mrs Wardrope is a...
3From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 7 June 1755 (Washington Papers)
When I had the pleasure to see you last, you expressd an Inclination a wish to be informd of my...
4To George Washington from Sarah Cary Fairfax, Ann Spearing, and Elizabeth Dent, 26 July 1755 (Washington Papers)
After thanking Heaven for your safe return I must accuse you of great unkindness in refusing us...
1756
5From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 23 September 1756 (Washington Papers)
John informs me that you told him Miss Nancy West was to be at your House in a day or two; and...
1757
6From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 15 November 1757 (Washington Papers)
I have lingerd under an Indisposition for more than three Months; and finding no relief above, on...
1758
7From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 13 February 1758 (Washington Papers)
The Inclosd came to my hands this moment—Colo. Carlyle desird after I had perusd the Papers, that...
8From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 4 March 1758 (Washington Papers)
Letters which I have just receivd from the President, and others from Winchester render it...
9To George Washington from Sarah Cary Fairfax, 1 September 1758 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: from Sarah Cary Fairfax, 1 Sept. 1758. On 12 Sept. GW wrote to Mrs. Fairfax :...
10From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 12 September 1758 (Washington Papers)
Yesterday I was honourd with your short, but very agreable favour of the first Instt. how...
11From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 25 September 1758 (Washington Papers)
Do we still misunderstand the true meaning of each others Letters? I think it must appear so, thô...
1779
12To George Washington from Sarah Cary Fairfax and George William Fairfax, 12 August 1779 (Washington Papers)
Mrs Græme a Lady of large property in South Carolina, the Place of Her Nativity, who has been in...
1785
13To George Washington from George William and Sarah Cary Fairfax, 2 July 1785 (Washington Papers)
Tho’ I did myself the honor of filling more than one sheet of Paper in answer to your Excellencys...
1798
14From George Washington to Sarah Cary Fairfax, 16 May 1798 (Washington Papers)
Five and twenty years, nearly, have passed away since I have considered myself as the permanent...
PBS ARTICLE
Mulatto Blood?
SOURCE

George William Fairfax letters with GW
Results 1-50 of 72 sorted by date (ascending)
1755
1From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 7 June 1755 (Washington Papers)
I had not the pleasure of receiving your favour till after my return from Williamsburg, when it...
2From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 23 October 1755 (Washington Papers)
We arrived here to-day, where I met Captains Cocks and Ashby, whom I have appointed to remain on...
1756
3To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 9 May 1756 (Washington Papers)
Upon hearing the many Alarming Accots at Williamsburg, I hasten’d away as soon as possible, tho....
1757
4To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 17 October 1757 (Washington Papers)
After a very Plesant journey we arrived here the 12th instt, and had the good fortune to find the...
5To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 6 December 1757 (Washington Papers)
I arrived here the 25th of last month since which there has not been an Opportunity to America,...
1758
6To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 25 July 1758 (Washington Papers)
Since my Arrival I have been much indisposed, and am now troubeld with slow Fevers every day. But...
7To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 5 August 1758 (Washington Papers)
I have scarcely time to acquaint you, That I was Yesterday at Mount Vernon to Visit Mr Patterson,...
8From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 22 August 1758 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 22 Aug. 1758. On 1 Sept. Fairfax wrote to GW : “I...
9From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 27 August 1758 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 27 Aug. 1758. On 1 Sept. Fairfax wrote to GW : “I...
10To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 1 September 1758 (Washington Papers)
I have this instant recd yours of the 22d & 27th Ultimo. The first Mrs Fairfax undertakes to...
11To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 1 September 1758 (Washington Papers)
As soon as I despatched the People upon business, I thought it best to come over here to see...
12From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 12 September 1758 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 12 Sept. 1758. On 15 Sept. Fairfax wrote to GW :...
13To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 15 September 1758 (Washington Papers)
Your favour of the 12th inste I had the pleasure to receive last Night and was sorry your last...
14From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 25 September 1758 (Washington Papers)
Your acceptable favour of the 15th I had the pleasure to receive Six days afterwards. I greatly...
1761
15From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 2 December 1760 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 2 Dec. 1760. On 30 Oct. 1761 Fairfax wrote to GW :...
16From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 6 March 1761 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 6 Mar. 1761. On 30 Oct. Fairfax wrote to GW : “Your...
17From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 3 April 1761 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 3 April 1761. On 30 Oct. Fairfax wrote to GW : “Your...
18To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 15 April 1761 (Washington Papers)
I came to Town about some business of Colo. Cary’s and could by no means omitt so good an...
19From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 27 July 1761 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 27 July 1761. On 30 Oct. Fairfax wrote to GW : “Your...
20From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 1 August 1761 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 1 Aug. 1761. On 30 Oct. Fairfax wrote to GW : “Your...
21To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 30 October 1761 (Washington Papers)
Your favors of the 2d of Decr 6th of March 3d of Apl 27th of July and first of Augt came very...
1762
22From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 30 October 1762 (Washington Papers)
I am sorry to be the Messenger of ill news, but it is incumbent upon me to inform you of the...
1763
23From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 17 July 1763 (Washington Papers)
We were a good deal disappointed in the promised Visit—A constant Watch was kept untill the...
24From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 20 July 1763 (Washington Papers)
I have not a Lath in the World of any kind, seasoned or unseasoned, or you shoud be heartily...
25From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 25 July 1763 (Washington Papers)
I will take the best care I can of your Letters, that for Mr Waite shall be sent to him, and an...
26From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 29 September 1763 (Washington Papers)
We are very sorry for Mrs Fairfax’s indisposition, and hope it is slight and will soon be...
1765
27To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 16 November 1765 (Washington Papers)
Herewith I enclose a Sketch of the Lands joining this the Tract &c. by the late Mr Green, which...
1770
28To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 12 March 1770 (Washington Papers)
I think you are extreamly right in not submitting to Mr Barrys terms; and I wish it was in my...
29From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 27 June 1770 (Washington Papers)
Herewith you will receive some Letters which I brought from Williamsburg; which place I left on...
1772
30To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 19 December 1772 (Washington Papers)
I received yours covering the Deeds and Bonds, which I have examined, and find right, except the...
1773
31To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 1 January 1773 (Washington Papers)
My whole attention being now fixed upon preparing for my trip to England . . . I find I can’t...
32From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 2 January 1773 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 2 Jan. 1773. On 19 Jan. 1773 GW wrote to Fairfax :...
33From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 19 January 1773 (Washington Papers)
If you are done with my Compass & Plotting Instruments, I should be glad to receive them by the...
34To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 19 January 1773 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: from George William Fairfax, 19 Jan. 1773. Listed in Thomas Birch’s Sons...
35To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 22 February 1773 (Washington Papers)
Altho’ I can hardly hold a Pen, yett this is to acknowl. the Receipt of yours, with a Letter for...
36To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 5 August 1773 (Washington Papers)
You may be surprized to receive a Letter of this date from me, as we might have reasonably...
37From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 25 September 1773 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 25 Sept. 1773. On 10 Jan. 1774 Fairfax wrote : “Your...
38From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 15 October 1773 (Washington Papers)
The Inclos’d is a copy of my last Letter sent by a ship from Patuxent (name I know not, Mr...
39To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 26 November 1773 (Washington Papers)
Having wrote to you, soon after my arrival in London, and immediately after my Wife’s recovery...
40From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 30 December 1773 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 30 Dec. 1773. On 30 June 1786 GW wrote Fairfax :...
1774
41To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 10 January 1774 (Washington Papers)
Your very Obliging favour of the 15th of October, covering a Copy of one dated the 25th of Septr...
42To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 31 March 1774 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: from George William Fairfax, 31 Mar. 1774 . On 30 June 1786 GW wrote Fairfax :...
43From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 15 May 1774 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 15 May 1774. On 30 June 1786 GW wrote Fairfax : “The...
44To George Washington from George William Fairfax, June 1774 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: from George William Fairfax, June 1774. On 25 July 1775 GW wrote to Fairfax :...
45From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 10–15 June 1774 (Washington Papers)
In my way to this place I met with your Letter of the 10th of Jany at Dumfries—In consequence of...
46From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 20 August 1774 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 20 Aug. 1774. On 30 June 1786 GW wrote Fairfax :...
47From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 15 November 1774 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 15 Nov. 1774. On 2 Mar. 1775 Fairfax wrote GW that...
48To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 2 March 1775 (Washington Papers)
Your very obliging favor of the 15th of November last, I received only the 23d Ulto. Immediately...
1775
49From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 6 April 1775 [letter not found] (Washington Papers)
Letter not found: to George William Fairfax, 6 April 1775. On 30 June 1786 GW wrote Fairfax :...
50From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 31 May 1775 (Washington Papers)
Since my last (dated about the first of April) I have received from Mr Craven Peyton the Sum of...
51From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 25 July 1775 (Washington Papers)
On the other side you will receive a Copy of my last, dated at Philadelphia the 31st of May, and...
52From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 26 July 1775 (Washington Papers)
In my hurry, Yesterday, I forgot the principal thing I had in view, when I sat down to write to...
1778
53From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 11 March 1778 (Washington Papers)
Immediately on my appointment to the command of the American Army and arrival at Cambridge (near...
54To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 3 August 1778 (Washington Papers)
By Genl Burgoynes great Politeness & kindness, I am not only made happy, by the fullest, and most...
1779
55To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 25 May 1779 (Washington Papers)
On the other side is a Copy of a Letter, that Genl Burgoyne was so obliging, as to undertake...
56To George Washington from Sarah Cary Fairfax and George William Fairfax, 12 August 1779 (Washington Papers)
Mrs Græme a Lady of large property in South Carolina, the Place of Her Nativity, who has been in...
57To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 5 December 1779 (Washington Papers)
I have lately received a Letter dated 13th of July last, from our worthy friend Mr Nicholas,...
1783
58To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 26 March 1783 (Washington Papers)
I cannot express the Joy with which I take up my Pen to congratulate your Excellency, upon the...
59From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 10 July 1783 (Washington Papers)
With very sincere pleasure I receiv’d your favor of the 26th March—It came to hand a few days...
60To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 9 December 1783 (Washington Papers)
From your very Wise resolution of retiring to your own Estate and biding adieu to public life for...
1784
61To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 10 June 1784 (Washington Papers)
I have been called upon very unexpectedly by a Gentn passing through this place to London, in...
62To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 23 August 1784 (Washington Papers)
Tho I had resolved to avoid being further troublesome to you an occasion has occur’d which...
1785
63From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 27 February 1785 (Washington Papers)
In a letter of old date, but lately received, from the Countess of Huntington, she refers me to a...
64To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 19 March 1785 (Washington Papers)
Mr Thomas Corbin, now in my House, proposing to Embark in a few days for Virginia, has earnestly...
65To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 23 June 1785 (Washington Papers)
By the receipt of your favor of Feby 27th I am well convinced of what I have long suspected, that...
66From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 30 June 1785 (Washington Papers)
When I wrote you in Feby last, I intended to have followed it with a letter of earlier date than...
67From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 10 November 1785 (Washington Papers)
Inclosed you have a copy of my last; since which nothing has occurred worthy of observation,...
1786
68To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 23 January 1786 (Washington Papers)
Being but just now informed that a Vessell is to Sail in a very few days from Bristol for...
69To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 25 January 1786 (Washington Papers)
This will I hope be presented to you by John Anstey Esqr. in his Tour through America. He goes...
70From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 25 June 1786 (Washington Papers)
Since I had the honor of writing to you in November last, I have been favoured with your letters...
71From George Washington to George William Fairfax, 30 June 1786 (Washington Papers)
Better late than never, is an adage not less true, or less to be respected, because it is old....
72To George Washington from George William Fairfax, 12 December 1786 (Washington Papers)
Hearing by accident that a Ship will sail in a Day or two from Bristol for Virginia I just...
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